Recap

I have a gym membership I hardly use. I try to meal prep and it never lasts very long. I set high expectations of myself and always fail after a week. 

Losing weight the second time around is harder. I'm working 50+hours a week and don't live right beside the gym. I have the money to choose fast food on the way home from a long day instead of preparing real food. I can't eat half the things I ate last time. My mental/emotional state is a wreck. And last but not least, I have several more health issues than I had before.

Back in the summer of 2011, I was gettin ready to head to my second college to get a "real degree". Before school started I got real serious about losing weight. I had hit 364.8 and I was not happy. While doing research about seizure treatment methods, I discovered that a low carb diet helped control seizure symptoms. Bonus side effect of low carving was weight loss. Well I jumped on that train real quick.

I lost a good 40 pounds in the first month without much exercise. Got to college and I had access to a 3 story gym with that included fitness classes. I starting going to the gym several times a week and took spin and toning classes. I stood out in both being over 300 pounds at the time. But it was surprisingly supportive environment giving it was a college campus. Over the next 3 years I dropped 169 pounds. I was 196 when I finished my degree. I have never been that small before ... or since. 

After college I took a year off and did a one year missions trip to 11 countries in 11 months. Between November 2013 and July 2014 I was back up to 250 and freaking out. I left for my missions trip in September 2014 and lost 15 pounds he first 2 months. It pretty much stayed there until march 2015. I started gaining weight rapidly and couldn't figure out why. By the time I got home from Asia I was back up to 280. 

I continued to gain weight when I got home. I currently weigh in around 365. 

I had gained 100 pounds over the course of a year. My doctor agreed it was odd but he never dug to figure out what was going on. Doctor number 2 didn't help at all either. Doctor number 3 has been able to pinpoint several health issues some of who h may have contributed to that and be causing it to be difficult to lose it again. 

My 2017 has been like this so far:

Gallbladder surgery 1-31-17

Carpal tunnel acting up - always

So. Much. Nausea. 2-20 thru 5-3

Enlarged thyroid and nodule discovered 3-16-17

Try meds for anxiety and acid reflux for two weeks after chest pains start

Get taken off those two meds because they made me sicker

Currently testing IBS meds 

Still feel sick at times

Always tired ....outside of the two weeks on the anxiety meds I haven't slept well in like 2 years

Still have chest pain

If I had to be honest I would say I feel miserable. Most days I feel like an overstuffed sausage. Not only do I hate the way I look but I hate the way I feel. I barely have any  energy. I am exhausted. I hurt. I feel trapped in my own body. 

I need change and the help to make it happen.